Divorce Mediation
What Is Divorce Mediation?
Divorce mediation in Maryland is when a married (husband and wife or same sex) couple choose to resolve the issues arising out of the dissolution of their marriage or their separation without going to Court and going through difficult and costly litigation. The issues can be varied and can range from alimony (does one spouse pay support money to the other spouse) to what happens to the marital home, to the division of bank accounts, retirement accounts, the property in the house (the “stuff”) to the division of the debt (whether it is credit card debt or the mortgage). In the mediation setting, each party is heard, listened to and their points and positions are given credit and respect. The mediator does not offer legal advice to the parties. The mediator is completely neutral and does not offer personal opinions but can offer various ways to consider different options. The mediator will help to ensure that both parties are heard in a forum of open discussions and will help facilitate that open forum. The mediation process is confidential and private. The process is self-directed and the parties determine their own resolutions.
Financial Disclosure
Certainly, no mediation can be successful unless both parties come to the mediation table with full financial disclosure and a willingness to be open, honest and willing to discuss all subjects, even those that are difficult and may be sensitive. The mediation setting is a neutral one, without judgment and without fault. Both parties will be heard and asked to explain their position if it is not understood. Financial forms will be given to both parties to be completed which will ask for their individual budgets as well as their assets and liabilities.
It will be necessary for the parties to collect and produce various financial documents such as their most recent retirement statements, recent tax returns and their most recent pay stubs. Current appraisals of real property and assets (jewelry for example) may also be used to help value the total assets of the parties before the parties can begin to discuss the division of the property (See Property Division). Current Credit Card Statements will be needed so that the Mediator can help the parties accurately look at and discuss how the debt will be divided and paid off. Other debt such as bank loans or car loans will also need to be considered and discussed.
Costs of Mediation vs Court
The Costs of Mediation vs The Costs of Litigation
Stacy has witnessed the inefficiency of some mediation processes, and of some litigation. She has seen some of each that can go on endlessly and be extremely costly. Her strategy will keep your mediation focused and goal oriented. As a mediator, Stacy is certainly not able to provide legal advice to clients, however, her direct experience with highly contested litigation affords her a perspective that most mediators simply do not have; one that greatly increases the chances of a successful resolution.
Being Part of The Decision-Making Process vs The Uncertainty of Going to Court
Let’s face it, going to court is a risk, and a big risk. No one knows and no one can predict how a Judge is going to rule on a particular day, on a particular issue, on a particular case. Taking an active role in the decision-making process lets you be a part of your future. You work with the mediator and your spouse/partner to decide what is going to happen with your and your child(ren)’s financial future. The uncertainty of leaving it to a Judge, who may or may not see the situation your way, is gone. What happens if the Judge does not see the case the same way you or your lawyer does? What happens if the Judge does not like you? Remember, the Judge’s decision is also based on how they assess your credibility. What if you do not have good witnesses? What if you do not have the experts you need? More litigation? Post-trial motions? An Appeal? Sometimes you have to wait months for a decision from a Judge. Then, you have to spend more money than most people have fighting again for those post-trial motions or an appeal because you do not like the Judge’s decision. Mediation avoids all of that.
If you have mediated your case that won’t happen. You will have come to a resolution that you agree with. All of the issues will be resolved. The mediated agreement can be as detailed as you want and need it to be. You and your spouse or partner can decide how detailed you want it to be. Going to Court and going through an emotional and costly trial will only yield a winner and a loser. Mediating your issues, coming up with a mutual resolution leaves you both with a joint agreement that was self-directed and mutually determined, leaving both of you in a position where you can leave the table with respect for each other and the process.